I’m so far behind where I’m supposed to be and I’m trying not to panic, though that didn’t work out too well last night at 9:00 p.m.
Me: I can’t do this! I have nothing to say! I’m an underqualified blogging hack with no literary grasp, or scope, and this was all just a horrible mistake so you’d better FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO POST ON INFINITE SUMMER, OH GOD.
Matthew: Buh-wha?
A series of talk-her-down e-mails ensued, wrapping up with a YouTube video of Feist on Sesame Street, singing about the number four. Then I slept for ten hours. Hey! Things are looking up.
I may have several points to make here, but number one is: how the fuck are you people finding time to read? Do none of you have jobs? Certainly you don’t have families, or children belonging to an age group that is defined by its inability to successfully manipulate a fresh band-aid. Too many people need me for too many things, and I suddenly see why it’s all I can do to throw up a blog post and then run screaming to put out another dryer lint fire, or keep a neglected dog from peeing In someone’s shoe, or sadly buttoning up another unironed shirt as I dash out the door to a job where a minor office sport is trying to guess how old I am.
But let’s think about this sentence for a moment:
A veritable artist, possessed of a deftness non-pareil with cotton swab and evacuation-hypo, the medical attaché is known among the shrinking upper classes of petro-Arab nations as the DeBakey of maxillofaial yeast, his staggering fee-scale as wholly ad valorem.
SHRINKing UPPer CLASSes of PETro-ARab NAtions whose STAGGering FEEs are WHOLly AD vaLORem.
I feel like Rex Harrison ought to burst in and start singing that.16 And somewhere in Nova Scotia there’s a soundproof bunker where some poor b-list Shakespearean actor has been subsisting on Jell-O and hand-rolled American Spirits, recording an unabridged audio version of Infinite Jest for the last thirteen years.
“I don’t mind,” Hal said softly. “I could wait forever.”
I hope he wraps it up soon and turns it into an 80-gig podcast or this book is going to become a doorstop. Again.
Comments
78 responses to “Breathing Into a Paper Bag”
I read on the train on my commute, which makes for a nice, heavy backpack most days. It’s okay, I can use the exercise. I also spend my lunch hours reading if possible. This Thursday I have a reading date with a fellow ISer. We’ll see how that goes.
I read from 5-6am and after my 13-month-old goes to bed. So far, I’m keeping up but I’m not sure how long it will last…
I have a job and two small kids (4 & 2rs,) work too many hours as a photo editor and writer (film.com) and am just keeping pace. I read a few pages before drifting off to sleep every night and on the bus to and from work. I’ve found myself even reading while walking to and from the bus, but with the heavy hardback first edition, it starts to hurt the back after 10 minutes or so.
I am reading through w/ my wife. We have given up watching TV in the evening, unless we are caught up, and regularly talk about it before going to bed.
I love you. I’m having the same struggles – you are not alone.
To illustrate, my own words from last night:
http://www.ashcanrantings.com/2009/06/ij-week-1-leah.html
Good luck!! Try not to stress! I’ll do the same!
I get most of my reading done during my hour lunch break at work
I’ve more or less cut out watching TV after 10 at night (or whenever the Sox game ends). Stewart and Colbert will still be there come autumn…
I had to cheat and start a week early, because that’s when I was going to the beach. Otherwise, I’m going to bed an hour earlier and reading, because I’d fall asleep too soon if I went to bed at the regular time.
I have a full-time job, no kids, and since I moved to a new apartment, no television or reliable internet. It’s actually been great. I ride my bike, cook something (aka smear something on a bagel), and read IJ.
I too, am stupid behind. I read at the park by my house when I have time.
Stupid internet, being the biggest distraction EVER.
I’ve had some chronic health issues that are keeping me in bed a lot, and what better excuse to read a giant book? I started one day before our official “start date” and I’m already over 300 pages in. And loving it!
In all honesty, I’m not finding the time. Well, that is to say I just started reading about 30 minutes ago. On a whim, I decided to read Hamlet beforehand, so I expected to be playing catch-up for the first couple of weeks. From now on I’ll probably do alternate days with IJ and whatever other book I’m reading. Mostly I read in bed at night or on the train.
I cut out a lot of TV. Usually find time to read between 10pm-1am. Blogging at lunch.
I’m currently seriously underemployed. And yes, no kids. So yeah, I can pretty much read whenever the mood strikes me. Although I am attempting to slog through 10 other books this summer, in addition to finally making it through Infinite Jest, for a total of 4665 pages.
In more employed times, I was a subway reader. I read almost every one of Against the Day‘s 1100 pages underground, over the course of about three months, to and from work, to and from social engagements, to and from. I actually found it hard getting a foothold in Infinite Jest without the motion of a train beneath me, without the stop-start of stations, without the crackly voice of a conductor (or computer-conductor) droning over the PA. Maybe as the summer rolls on, I’ll find myself riding out to Coney Island and back, to the Far Rockaways, not for the beach, but for the cocoon, in a frantic attempt to catch up, to stay on track. So far though, I seem to surviving above the surface, as it were.
I read during my lunch hour, is when I specifically have time, for reading. Also, I try to set aside an hour each night. This isn’t easy, especially since I’m working on the word-blog as I read and some of DFW’s words take staggering amounts of time and effort w/r/t to research. But I’m keeping up, so far.
I also keep the book with me at all times. If I have five minutes, I read. If I have 30 minutes, I read. Stephen King once wrote that you have to learn to read in small sips as well as in big gulps, and I find that especially useful with IJ.
Also, reading whilst walking is possible. Just keep an eye out for intersections, low-hung street signs, household animals, roadside detritus, and congregations of people in wheelchairs.
We’re furloughed for a week (office closed, no pay), so it’s been pretty easy to find the time to get far enough into the book where I probably won’t put it down and forget about it like the last two times I tried to slog through it.
I read on my lunch break, in my car when stuck in traffic, and, mostly, after I put my kiddo to bed, especially on the weeks when my wife works evenings. I have a nice little window there.
“I don’t mind,” Hal said softly. “I could wait forever.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icSQcLTJpT8
I’ve been carrying my Kindle around like it’s a parole bracelet. I read right when I wake up while I’m drinking my coffee, waiting for the caffeine to kick in. I take a break in the middle of the day and go outside and lay in the sun and read until I’m absolutely drenched in sweat (it’s 100+ in TX). And then I read late at night, in bed, while I’m trying to fall asleep, which has been making for some strange dreams.
I fell woefully behind from the start, but used the sunny weekend to soak up the shade on the patio and got caught up. I’m once again behind, but the long weekend ahead of me says I’ll probably be able to catch up again. Basically, I’m saving my serious reading for long, uninterrupted stretches of weekend afternoons.
Mainly on the London Underground commute. Don’t know what my fellow travellers think of the brick of a book I’m carrying.
What with the labyrinthine tunnels, and the diversity of humanity all crossing paths on the way to the next scene in their lives, it seems an appropriate place to read the majority of IJ.
Oh, for sure, I am quite behind too.
I read at work, over my lunch, in the bathroom, in the tub, at dinner, at breakfast. Wherever I can, hahaah.
It’s still not enough!
Having read infinite jest before this, 75 pages a week sounded reasonable. Then I remembered this was Infinite Jest and not a normal book.
The first week coincided with me taking a multi-city trip, so I had a lot of time to read in transit–subways, buses, planes, etc. I find that I read better and faster when I’m in motion. Now that I’m back home, not sure if I’ll be able to keep up. Time will tell.
I usually read when at night when I’m back from work. I found that leaving my laptop at the office during weedays gives me a lot of free time.
And on the weekends I try to read at least 50 pgs.
I have a Sony Reader with IJ loaded onto it. I have a 30 minute bus ride to work 2x a day 5 days a week, which is devoted solely to reading. If I find a spare half hour or so before bed I’ll read then, too. I also have 4 kids and a full-time job, so if I wasn’t a bus commuter I’d be sharing your shoes.
I do not have a job in the summer (I teach). I do not have kids. I junked my summer reading list for this chance instead. I am behind because I only started this morning, but imagine I will be on track by the end of the week. (I have read the first 100 pages or so many times, but never more than that. I bobbed in the Dead Sea.)
Ha! I happen to be in a new city for a summer internship that only takes up 3 days a week. I have no other job and no friends in town. Infinite Summer couldn’t have come at a better time.
Yeah! Me too. My internship is five days, but pays about 550 a month so the book has taken the place of coffee, alcohol, snacks, movies, concerts and any other form of expenditure that’s not essential to survival.
This has been the best and most real post on this website yet. Good luck and I really hope you keep writing for this because that captured the whole feeling of IJ…and I don’t even have a job.
I don’t find the time. I don’t even look for it. OED’s word of the day, coincidentally, is “devolution.”
“2. fig. The rolling or passing on of time; descent or passing on through a series of revolutions or stages, in time, order, etc.”
Uh, huh. Can’t wait to re-live this in nightmares where I show up for Infinite Summer and everybody is on page 242 and I’m stuck on 59. And I am stuck on 59. Thank you for this post, I promise to stop making this like work.
Man, I love the hell out of that Beatles reference. And how Hal fucks it up by skipping to a different verse.
Anyway, I am a funemployed freelance writer, which means most of my day is spent clad only in underwear and in front of my computer. Taking time to read Infinite Jest is taking a long breath after a season of drowning.
And despite the fact that it takes me forever to read, I find it hard to put it down. Though it is discouraging when I realize 90 minutes have passed and I’ve only advanced 20 pages.
Night when I take my son to bed.
Afternoon when my son is napping.
In the bathroom.
Don’t recommend reading it in the tub! Did that first time I read it. Disaster, but the pages dried quickly.
In the car (when I’m not the driver).
Before dinner while the kids play on the slip-n-slide.
I’m unemployed, 26 years old, single and my sole ward is a 3 year old chihuahua, so I am in an enviable position, at least by Infinite Summer standards.
Stick with it man, I’m a little farther than you, its worth it. I’m trying not to hurry, just enjoy; pre-coffee or bed, post-work and dinner.
Count me in among those who’ve cut out a lot of TV from their routine. Also I’m hauling it on the subway to and from the office every day, although that cuts into my people-watching time, which is not as easy to give up as TV, so you are less likely to see me actually reading on the subway than you are likely to see me peering over the top of the book unapologetically at whoever is seated across from me.
I am a high school librarian, so I am fortunate to have the summer off. No kids, all my friends and my husband work regular jobs, so it’s just me and my 2 dogs all day. They are happy to hang out with me no matter what I am doing, so thus far I’ve been able to keep up, read other books (I’m big into YA lit) and get stuff done around the house. We’ll see how long I stay that motivated. Good luck finding the time!
I’ve been reading at night before going to bed, but I’m a little bit behind. I’m going to have to start reading at lunch at work. I have a husband, toddler, and a puppy, and I don’t think the toddler is going to accept IJ as his bedtime story. 75 pages a week would be a lot more doable if I didn’t find myself so often wanting to pause and re-read something. I’m not even taking the time to look up words in the dictionary, and it’s still slow. It’s also amazing, and I love reading it.
I’m only on page 60. And I’m a FAST reader.
I’ve been reading for long stretches on the weekends and I stay up much too late at night after the house is quiet. I work full time, but I don’t have any kids at home and that makes all the difference in the world. Don’t stress! This is supposed to be fun. I do believe this works better when you can carve out a couple of hours now and then, rather than trying to grab a few minutes here and there. Take heart though. No matter how you find the time, it’s very disorienting for the first couple of hundred pages and then the threads all start coming together nicely. Relax 🙂
Apparently Eden thinks her life is somehow more important than this project. Caring for your children comes first, eh brute?
Let me ask you this: What are you doing while driving? Nothing! Exactly.
But, if you can’t managed to squeeze out your less important priorities, here are some helpful tips:
1. Have the dog tattooed with pages of the book. Not only will it keep you reading while cleaning up after another slipper accident, but what a conversation piece.
2. Force your children to recite pages aloud. Sure you may be putting on a band-aid or buttoning a shirt, but what are they doing? Besides, forcing them to read IJ will only help their reading ability and vocabulary.
3. Stop doing actual work at work. It will take the average employer several weeks, if not months, to realize you’ve stopped all productivity. (Note: this tip doesn’t have to be just for IJ. In fact, any exercise you’d rather be doing fits in quite nicely. Peggle, anyone?)
I think with these helpful tips, you’ll be back on board in no time. Otherwise, I’ll be happy to post my own audiobook files after each successful night of reading, which may not be as entertaining as Rex Shmex Harrison, but will lead the way to a revolutionary new genre of audiobook beyond the scope of human understanding.
Having forced my way through Kierkegaard’s “Either/Or” right before this (actually, I’m not quite finished, but…) IJ seems like a breeze–no, really! As my s.o. said to me this morning “well, at least you seem to be reading something actually entertaining.”
I’ve been getting up at 5am and reading for two hours before I have to get out the door to work. I also sat in a cafe on Sunday and read for four hours. Netflix is to be canceled this week, meanwhile hoping the insomnia keeps helping out.
I’m on holidays right now, so am trying to build myself a bit of a buffer for when I’m back at work. Having said that, I work part-time, which is perfect for this since I carried the book in my bag once and will not be doing that again. Once this two weeks is up, I’ll be reading on my days off, with perhaps a bit snuck in before bed.
I travel for business and read on planes. It can be great down-time. I was fortunate to get a trip to Australia during the first week (with some interesting travel circumstances), so I am ahead. I also keep waking up at 4:00 AM because I haven’t adjusted to the time zone.
That said, I would be reading something anyway. Just spending more time on one book than several others.
My reading/travel adventure is here: http://herodot.us/tag/infinite-summer/
I’m ditching talks at a conference and falling behind in my other summer professorly duties (uh, research?) to read. I’m just keeping up, but have upcoming travels which means planes which means much reading, so I should be fine.
But how are you all cutting out TV when Wimbledon is on? I’m not watching much else, but I’m DVRing lots of tennis, and it feels right to go back and forth between that and IJ.
Unfortunately, sacrificing other hobbies seems to be panning out as the only way to make this mission possible. Blogs, IM’s, daily RSS feeds and internet distractions in general have currently been put on hold. TV has been nearly exclusively reduced to oddly-timed 90’s sitcom reruns, mainly to “vent out” the old noodle.
Whenever you’re feeling down and desperate, just remember: there is nothing Feist can’t make better!
I read constantly now, one of the few benefits of the unemployed. (The con being not able to afford new books.) When I DO have a job — hopefully soon, let’s-keep-our-fingers-crossed — I read at lunch, when I get home from work, and in the evening. Nothing is better than a good book, and it’s how I give time to myself.
I finally caught up to page 83 today. My 6 year old is taking swimming lessons in the morning, so I try to get my reading done then. Of course, the lessons end next week and then…I’ll have to find another way to keep up. And also, my husband is reading the book and he is rather behind too- 50ish pages behind where I am. I’m so glad we are in good company!
I quit my job, broke up with my girlfriend, told all my friends I’m doing a tour of Europe and will return on September 23, moved into a basement, threw away the key and I sleep on a bed made of hundreds of cans of tuna. When Infinite Summer is over, I’ll be sleeping on the floor.
I’m usually reading in bed before I go to sleep. Read the first 75 pages with the softcover but hated going back and forth with the endnotes so yesterday I splurged for the Kindle edition as well. Being able to just click on the endnote (and one click back to the book) makes it soooo much easier (and faster). And I can even read some on my IPhone Kindle app if I have a few minutes.