The Guides have begun reading, but won’t begin commentary until the 29th. This week they will use this space to introduce themselves. Feel free to do likewise, in the comments or in the forums.
“He was forty, and she was twenty. Big age difference. Especially at that age. But they had a baby, and she turned into a completely different person. She punched him. Kicked him in the privates.”
Oh, sorry. That’s part of a conversation I overhead this morning in a diner11 as I waited for my order to arrive and tried pretty darn hard to read Infinite Jest.
I figured since I had to sit through some middle-aged woman’s not-so-elegant discussion of postpartum depression, you should too. Hope you enjoyed it.
Of course, this is something I’ll have to get used to. I’m not the fastest reader, and I’ve never dealt with such a lengthy book before12 so my method of getting to the end of this thing will be to read it whenever possible, no matter what (possibly loud and obnoxious) company I’m in.
Diner table. Bus stop. Therapy. Wait, scratch that last one. Or maybe not — considering the themes already touched upon in the first hundred pages of IJ, maybe the pretence that I read the tome in the company of my mental health practitioner will be taken as some deep, insightful tying-in of commentary and commented-upon.
Which would certainly not be any kind of misrepresentation on my part. I am insightful as balls.13
This space was meant to be taken to introduce myself to you all. There’s a chance I’m failing. In fairness, I’m a little nervous, realizing that if this were Sesame Street, I’d be the kid singled out as the one “doing her own thing”. My fellow guides are all distinctly proven entities, whereas I’m the plucky newcomer with the lucky bat and the sports metaphor that doesn’t make sense in the context of literature discussion.
If you’re wondering, I’m told I’m here to provide a youthful perspective, which I can only read as meaning that the other guides are decrepit and irrelevant, and I’m the cool, young chick that’ll bring in the 18-35 demographic we so desperately crave so that we can make muchos advertising dollars off of David Foster Wallace’s back.
To recap: we’re shills; I’m the only guide worth reading, because I’m young; and having babies makes you hit your husband. I hope you’re taking notes.
Comments
15 responses to “Poochie”
LULZ! I am so far behind but have noticed already that I am enjoying the second read a little more than the first. Why id I wait over a decade to read it again. Oh right. . .it’s crazy huge! Everyone I know that has read it is 35 and under. Maybe you bring something else, Ms. Edison?
“I am insightful as balls.”
You are now my favorite guide.
My favorite conversation that distracted me from reading was: “I don’t keep any pets that I can’t kill with my bare hands. I went to a friend’s house and they had an un-caged bird and I said, ‘You better put that back in its cage or I am going to snap its neck.’ Sure enough, next time I came over the bird was in its cage.”
By far my favorite post thus far. Takes straight DFW “reverence” and jazzes it up with an “ir”.
I’ve been reading on the subway, where the most distracting thing for me is the stares I get from other riders for wielding a pad of post-its, two bookmarks, a pen, and a 1,000-page book.
You’re the best, Avery!
Infinite Summer just got even more better !
You could bring it to read in the waiting room of your therapist’s office. I actually saw a copy of Oblivion in a therapist’s waiting room once, which was interesing. I mean, is it wise to provide depressing reading material to people who are already depressed? On the other hand, maybe it is. I read that DFW said that fiction should disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed. (http://www.mcsweeneys.net/dfw/tributes.html)
Too funny!
Latham 76, huh? Upstate NY, rep-rah-zent!
I know you, Avery Edison. How fun.
All I have to add is that when I picked up the book from the shelf to crack it today, I found my nomination ballot for the 1999 Senior Class Superlatives.
Which means, not only did I never turn in my ballot (and probably why I didn’t win “Best Eyes”), but that I have had this book since at least 1999, in high school, when I first attempted it.
Ha! That’s great about the Animorphs. You have instantly made yourself more awesome. I read all those books when I was in middle school – except for that Megamorph book when they were dinosaurs. Maybe you could work more Animorphs into future posts…please?
Completely off topic – cool name. The two top names on my daughter’s potential names list were Avery and Edison.
at 62 I am probably the oldest reader but I won’t give up I know it will make sense soon?? yikes!!
Hi.larious. That is all. Just hilarious. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go hit my husband.
Not so Linda…my book club ranges from 61-74.